Audience: Olders to Elders - SoloAgers 
- Empty Nesters - Continuing Educators 
- Professionals - Retired Creators
- Grandparents - Younger-Older-Mentors 
- and YOU!

Moving In: 

For this article, we review seven common mistakes that new mentors often make while they create their wise practices mentoring approach. By understanding these pitfalls, and reframing/revamping them as action-outcomes, new mentors can navigate the mentoring terrain more effectively and create meaningful, impactful relationships with their mentees.

Lack of Goal Clarity:

When diving into mentoring without a clear set of goals, without a defined direction, the mentoring relationship may lack focus, hindering both the mentor's and mentee's progress. 

A mentoring approach emphasizes goal setting, ensuring alignment of all parties in their objectives and they have a roadmap for achieving success.

Insufficient Relationship Building:

Building a strong mentor-mentee relationship is the cornerstone of effective mentoring. Beginners may overlook the importance of investing time in getting to know their mentees on a personal level. 

A mentoring approach emphasizes relationship building, fostering trust and rapport that lays the foundation for collaborative conversations and mutual growth.

Neglecting Individualized Approaches:

Every mentee is unique, with distinct strengths, weaknesses, and learning styles. It’s easy to fall into the trap of applying a one-size-fits-all approach. 

A mentoring approach encourages mentors to tailor their guidance based on the individual needs and preferences of each mentee, maximizing the impact of the mentorship.

Failure to Foster Independence:

Often, new mentors make the mistake of providing solutions instead of empowering mentees to find their own answers, which is an error for both of you. 

A mentoring approach emphasizes fostering independence, guiding mentees to develop critical thinking and problem, appreciative, and humble inquiry skills essential for personal and professional growth.

Inadequate Collaborative Conversation:

Effective communication is at the heart of successful mentoring relationships. Without a structured approach, new mentors may struggle with “when you listen–you learn, where you share–you educate” gaps that result in misunderstandings or unclear expectations. 

A mentoring approach emphasizes regular, open, and honest dialogue, ensuring that both agree throughout the mentoring journey.

Ignoring Feed-Forward Loops:

Feed-forward is a dynamic tool/technique for growth, yet new mentors may neglect incorporating feed-forward loops into their mentoring relationships. 

A mentoring approach encourages mentors to seek feed-forward from and share feed-forward with mentees, creating a continuous loop of improvement and refinement.

Overlooking Continuous Learning:

Mentoring is an energetic (and spirited) system/process that requires ongoing learning for knowing for doing. Focusing on sharing existing concepts and practices may get you started. However, updates – up levels – upgrades follow according to the shared terms of the mentee and mentor. 

A mentoring approach underscores the importance of continuous learning (improvement), encouraging mentors to stay informed about unfolding trends, new methodologies, and experimental practices.

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as your wise practice checklist.

For Goal Clarity

__Develop a goal-setting approach using models like SMART and PACT

__Record the agreed-upon goals in a shared document (physical or digital) for transparency and accountability.

__Schedule check-ins to assess progress towards the goals for adjustments and/or celebration 

For Building Relationship 

__Conduct an initial meeting to discuss mentee's goals and expectations.

__Schedule regular check-in meetings to build trust and open communication. 

__Demonstrate genuine interest in your mentee's personal and professional aspirations. 

For Individual Approaches

__Conduct an initial needs assessment with each mentee to understand their goals, strengths, weaknesses, and preferred learning styles.

__Develop a personalized development plan for each mentee that reflects their unique needs and learning style. 

__Adjust the mentoring approach based on the mentee's progress and feed-forward. 

For Independence

__Identify at least one action they will take independently to address a challenge or goal.

__Analyze a problem and propose potential solutions during discussions.

__Tackle challenges independently by the conclusion of the mentoring program. 

For Collaborative Conversations

__Establish a consistent meeting schedule (weekly, bi-weekly, monthly). 

__Craft questions that encourage mentees to elaborate, share challenges, and articulate their needs (e.g., "What specific roadblocks are you facing?" or "How can I best support you in achieving this goal?").

__Pay close attention to the mentee's verbal and nonverbal cues, acknowledge their thoughts and feelings, and paraphrase key points for clarity.

For Feed-Forward

__Solicit feed-forward from mentees on the effectiveness of your mentoring approach. 

__Integrate mentee feed-forward into your mentoring style to better support their growth. 

__Establish a comfortable environment where both you and your mentee feel empowered to provide constructive feed-forward. 

For Continuous Learning

__Schedule a regular time for professional development. 

__Seek resources to stay updated on current trends and best practices. 

__Engage in open discussions with your mentee about emerging trends and challenges.

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